


I know

by PerriewinkleNerdie



Category: Open Heart (Visual Novel)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-12
Updated: 2019-09-12
Packaged: 2020-10-17 08:57:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20618402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PerriewinkleNerdie/pseuds/PerriewinkleNerdie
Summary: They are not as smooth as they think they are





	I know

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, hello, hello!  
This is my first smut ever, so it's the first sinning I did :D it's combined with fluff and comfort, just to balance it out a little  
Enjoy! <3

He felt as though he was burning. Alive. If it wasn’t for the fact that he was sitting in the room with other doctors, all keeping tabs on him, trying to get his attention, he would sure as hell be dead, his skin would be red from the heat.

No, he wasn’t sick. There was absolutely nothing wring with him medically. Well, maybe except for the fact that he seemed to have a heart attack. All because of _her_.

Clarissa Herondale. For an outside person she was just smiling at him, sending him a friendly look. But he knew better.

He saw all the little details about her. The way her hair fell over her shoulders, catching the light. The way her clothes enhanced her body, all the curves she didn’t like but he loved. The way she was biting her lip, _definitely on purpose_, knowing full well that he was watching. He felt heat rise to his cheeks, wanting to turn away from her but he didn’t seem to be able to do that just yet.

His eyes left hers for a moment to take in her appearance. His gaze dragged up her body, focusing on every little detail, lingering on her legs, her waist, her chest and finally her face. A blush bloomed on her cheeks.

They were both playing a dangerous game, undressing each other with their eyes in the room full of people. People that had no idea about their relationship. They didn’t know about the intimacy and comfort they shared, the depth of their emotions.

He finally managed to tear his eyes away from her, not without difficulties, doing so making him feel a pain that was almost physical, but he knew he had to. He prayed that no one caught on their little game.

Only later, that evening, when he was alone at home, sitting on his couch with Jenner by his feet, did he reflect on their relationship. He remembered very clearly how he realized he felt something for her.

She had a long day behind her, her shift coming to a close when one of her patients went into cardiac arrest. She immediately rushed to help him, doing everything she could to save him but to no avail. Nurses rushed into the room but it was too late. He was gone.

Claire was moving through the halls slowly, not paying attention to where she was going or who she was passing by. She didn’t notice Ethan Ramsey watching her go by, a worried look on his face.

She went out of the building out back, taking a deep breath to try to calm her ripped apart nerves but that didn’t do much. Her body was trembling, her posture small, her arms around her, trying to make herself as small as she could. He approached her slowly, putting his hand on her shoulder to not startle her. Her head whipped around to face him, tears streaking down her face. She was falling apart. He could see that, even though she probably didn’t want him to see her so vulnerable.

“Rookie?” he asked softly. She didn’t respond. “Hey, Rookie, what’s wrong? What happened?” his hand squeezed her shoulder slightly to get her attention.

“I… he… card…” she started mumbling, her words blurring, her breaths shallow and irregular. He realized she begun hyperventilating, if he didn’t help her, she’d pass out any second.

“Hey, Clarissa, look at me.” He moved his hands to the sides of her face, his index fingers behind her ears.

Their eyes met. He saw a new batch of tears form and threaten to fall down her cheeks. Her lip trembled. He moved her hands to place them on his chest and then returned his hands to her face, not breaking eye contact.

“When you feel me breathe, you breathe, okay? In and out.” He whispered, their faces so close together he could feel the air on his lips when she took a shaky breath through her mouth.

He slowly felt her relax, her shoulders slumping down, her breathing coming back to normal, tears still falling.

Without warning, she dove headfirst into him, her face buried in his chest, her hands flush between them. He had to take a step back to prevent them from falling, but he managed to keep them upright, his arms hesitantly wrapping themselves around her.

They have been flirting back and forth for the last couple of weeks. Or, at least, he thought they did. But they have never been this close.

He felt his control over his own emotions slip. He didn’t know what to do. He felt her fingers grip his lab coat tightly, her nose nuzzled softly into him, taking a deep breath. He moved his hands up and down her back in a comforting motion.

She leaned back a little, her eyes avoiding his.

“Sorry… I don’t know what came over me. You shouldn’t have to see than and you _definitely _shouldn’t have to comfort me. It won’t happen again.” She stepped back, away from him, and turned to leave. His hand shot out in her direction before he could think about what he was doing.

“Rookie… Clarissa. You don’t have to be sorry. I told you, it’s good you care. And while I don’t know what happened, you really don’t have to apologize for being human.” She hesitated before speaking.

“My patient… he was stable. He was supposed to go home in two days. And then… something happened. He went into cardiac arrest. I don’t know what went wrong. I was fighting like hell but… I didn’t manage to save him. I am the worst doctor here, how can I ask my patients to trust me when the moment something happens, I am unable to help them?” she started ranting again, her breathing getting labored once more.

“Okay… we are getting out of here. Go change and meet me out front, we’ll go eat something.” He looked into her eyes, searching for any signs of disapproval. He found none, only sadness and tiredness.

Twenty minutes later she stepped outside, looking around to find him leaning on the wall, his grey sweater tight against his body.

“Shall we?” he approached her, extending his arm for her to take. She looped her hand through his and they made their way towards the restaurant down the street.

They entered the building, his hand on the small of her back, guiding her gently inside, holding the door open for her.

The hostess took them to the table by the wall in the secluded part of the room.

He moved her chair for her, waited until she sat down and only then did he take his place in front of her.

They placed their orders and received their drinks. A long silence took them over, neither saying anything. He looked at her to find her eyes already on him.

“You’re not the worst doctor. You’re not even a bad doctor. Things like this happen, you did all you could do to save that man, you cannot beat yourself up for something out of your reach. I don’t want to ever hear you say you are a bad doctor. Do you understand, Rookie?” he was frustrated. Why did it have to happen to her? Why does she not believe in herself, see herself the way he sees her?

“Thank you, dr. Ramsey. It means a lot to me.” She smiled shyly, her cheeks reddening.

They talked all evening, getting to know each other, becoming familiar.

He walked her home, keeping his distance to not draw attention of her roommates in case one of them was looking out the window. Once they were on the corner of her street, she turned to him.

“As much as I’d love to continue walking with you, I don’t think it’s the wisest decision. I’ll see you tomorrow?” she flashed him a big smile and he nodded.

“Of course, you’re right. Goodnight, Claire. Take care of yourself. Rest.” He smiled softly and turned to leave when he felt her hand on his shoulder. The next thing he knew, her lips were on his cheek, kissing him there softly.

“Good night, Ethan.” She whispered delicately into his ear and turned around, leaving him alone, flabbergasted, confused… and amazed.

He didn’t think she would notice him. He thought he was subtle with his hints. He never would have thought that a woman like her would look at a man like him for more than a second.

He should have known she would notice the change in his behavior towards her eventually. She was the smartest person he knew and he wasn’t embarrassed to admit it.

She changed him. Opened him up to new experiences and new emotions, things he never thought he could do, want to do.

They have been together for the last five months. Keeping it a secret was difficult, especially considering the fact that she was living with other interns. She told one of her friends about them, Sienna was her name, he believed. She was a great help, allowing them to be on high alert when her roommates were coming back to the apartment and he was still there. More often than not, though, they were at his place. And that was exactly where they were now.

They agreed to meet up at his apartment after work, he’d cook dinner and then they would just relax on the couch, maybe watch some movies.

He came back home before her, getting their meal ready. She joined him and Jenner an hour later, a jacket hugged closely to her body, shivering a little form the cold weather outside. He invited her in, took her jacket from her and hanged it on the back of the chair in his dining room.

Ethan went back to the kitchen, stirring the pasta sauce, keeping it from burning. Suddenly he felt a pair of hands run up and down his sides, tickling him lightly before moving to his chest, her fingers scraping the skin beneath his shirt where two top buttons were undone.

He let out a little moan, she has been on his mind since that morning. He put down the spoon he was holding and turned around, placing his hands dangerously low, his fingers grazing her backside slightly, keeping their hips pressed together.

“Dr. Ramsey! I never took you for that type of a man!” she pretended to be shocked, a fake gasp escaping her. He laughed, pressing her even closer to him.

“What kind of a man?” he whispered in her ear.

“Hungry… desperate… and _scandalous._” She had trouble forming her thoughts and words, the things he was doing to her with those hands of his…

“I’m not hungry. _I’m starved. And not for food, mind you.”_ he kissed her down her neck, nipping on the skin there, sucking softly, leaving tiny marks that would be visible the next morning.

They somehow managed to finish dinner and actually eat it, drinking wine and laughing. Afterwards they moved to the couch, wine glasses and a bowl of popcorn before them. She took the bowl with snacks in her arms and sat down on the other end of the couch, her legs on his, his fingers massaging them softly.

They were watching a medical show. She should have known not to do that. Not with Ethan. How could she have forgotten than he would not stop himself from destroying it to the pieces? What was she even thinking?

Anyway, here they were, the show barely even started and he was already pulling it apart. At first she was trying to ignore him, trying to enjoy the show as much as she could. But the more they watched the more vocal he got.

Eventually she decided she would try to stop him from making these comments. So instead of talking over him, she started throwing popcorn at him. At first he didn’t notice, and when he did, he decided to ignore her with the most annoyingly smug and beautiful smile she’s ever seen. He knew _exactly_ what he was doing to her and he was enjoying it.

That went on for almost half an hour, she was running out of popcorn, most of it on the floor, but that didn’t matter. That’s when she decided to try something new.

She moved her legs, it startled him a little, but not as much as what she did next. She sat in his lap, straddling him, and kissed him. _Long and hard._ She bit his lip, tugging on it with force, drawing a loud groan from him as his hands grabbed her hips and began moving her against him.

A soft moan reached his ears, igniting fire inside of him, making him kiss her harder, their tongues dancing together. He moved on the couch, laying down on it, keeping her on top of him. She broke the kiss and trailed her lips down his neck, unbuttoning his shirt slowly, sensually, kissing every bit of newly revealed skin. She leaned back, looking at his disheveled state, cheeks red, mouth open, eyes dark with desire, breathing heavily. Tracing her finger along his lips, full and bruised from the force of their kisses, she leaned forward slightly, whispering to him.

“If I had known a kiss would make you shut up, I wouldn’t have wasted so much popcorn.” She moved her kisses again, this time to the side of his head, pressing her lips to the skin behind his ear, driving him crazy. She then pulled on his earlobe, biting and sucking on it. His hands were still on her hips, still moving and pressing her against him, the last of his control slipping from his grasp. He knew there would be no coming back from behind that line. They haven’t crossed that line yet. She told him she was still a virgin and he didn’t want to push her into something she might not want, not matter the amount of times she told him she’s ready and willing. It took him a lot of effort to stop and control himself.

He felt like he might not be able to control himself this time round. And she didn’t seem all to concerned about the direction in which their current activity was heading.

His hands moved underneath her shirt, going higher and higher, discovering more and more of her skin, his fingers touching the back of her bra. He felt her shiver, her lips returning to his, the intensity of their kisses picking up.

They were, sadly, interrupted by the knocking on the door.

“Ethan? Are you in there?” the voice of Harper Emery pierced the silence, previously interrupted only by their moans, heavy breathing and the sound of their clothes moving against one another.

They looked at one another, panic all over their faces. They hurriedly stood up, he began buttoning up his shirt, she helped him get his hair back in the normal state.

“Just a moment!” he shouted towards the door, pointing at the door of his bedroom to Claire. “Hide and wait there, I’ll be right back.” She ran away, as quietly as she could, not closing the door all the way though, so she could hear and see what was happening.

Ethan opened the door, trying to keep his emotions at bay. They were so close to getting caught. What was she even doing here at this ungodly time of the evening?

“Good evening, Harper? What can I do for you?” he decided to keep things civil. A small, friendly smile took over her features.

“Good evening, Ethan. Sorry to bother you at home this late, but the board of directors decided to end the competition early and I need your decision _now._” a shadow passed her face as he let her in.

“Oh, okay. Please, sit down.” He led her towards the table, leaving her to go towards his cabinet, getting his files and then joining her.

“So, I know that I said that I think Aurora should win…” she said, her voice confident. “…but she spoke to me today. She told me she actually doesn’t want it. it’s not for her, she’s not interested in this part of the medicine.” She winced, looking sad and disappointed.

He was shocked. Never would he have thought that these words would leave her lips.

“So… what is it exactly that you want me to do?” he wasn’t sure if he could contain his excitement. Does this mean…

“I want you to tell me which intern you want for your team. I know you must have your own pick. I’m sorry I tried to impose my own opinion on you. So, who is it going to be?” the corners of her lips went up, almost as if she knew something.

“I want dr. Herondale. She has been nothing short of an exceptional doctor, it’s a pleasure to work with her, her patients are in good hands, never complaining and always taken care of. I don’t see anyone else for that position.” He finished, feeling out of breath. He had to bite his tongue a few times, careful not to let his intense emotions for the woman he was infatuated with shine through.

Harper smiled brightly at him, pleased with his answer.

“I agree. She is an amazing material for a great doctor, her compassion and dedication to help people is admirable. I will present her to the board tomorrow. Have a nice evening.” She extended her hand to him and he took it, shaking it delicately. He started walking her to the door when she stopped in her tracks and turned around to face him again, a teasing and genuine smile on her lips.

“Ethan, I know.” She spoke slowly, seeing panic peek through his resolve.

“Know what, Harper?” he tried to play stupid, hoping and praying she didn’t mean what he thought she did.

“I know about _her._ You are not as smooth as you think.” She laughed at his shocked expression.

“What? How?” he asked, his voice cracking. She pointed towards two wine glasses on the coffee table. And then towards Claire’s jacket on the chair _she was sitting on_.

He realized how stupid he’s been, his heart racing.

“Harper, I…”

“Ethan, it’s okay. You do know that, right?”

“What do you mean?”

“I can see right through you. You are _happy. The happiest I’ve ever seen you._ I know it’s _her_ effect. If she makes you happy, then I am happy too. I respect your decision to choose her for the team, you know what is best and I’m not going to stop you from working with her if you think it is best.”

“Thank you, Harper.” An honest smile took over his features, his posture relaxing.

“I’m proud of you.” she smiled at him one last time before walking out the door. He turned the lock and let his head fall against he wooden surface, feeling as though all the air escape his body.

Then he remembered that she was still here, locked in his room. He sprinted there, opening the room and stopping in his tracks.

Claire was laying on his bed, with nothing but her lingerie on, smiling at him. Widely and seductively. She stood up slowly, approaching him, her steps soft.

He felt like his heart was about to leap out of his chest. She stood in front of him, her hands went around his neck, pulling him down towards her. Her lips almost touched his, he could feel the taste of them, but they missed his, by a millimeter, moving towards his ear instead.

He groaned loudly, his hands gripping her almost naked hips, her skin hot under his fingers.

“It’s good she finally knows.” She whispered in his ear, little moans escaping her mouth as his hands roamed her body.

“You heard everything, didn’t you?”

“Yes. I heard your touching speech.” She teased him, smiling as she pulled on his hair.

“You have no idea how relieved I am that I that I don’t have to hide it from her anymore. Because it means that I won’t have to limit my affections towards you anywhere. And I never would have thought that Aurora, of all people, would resign from the competition. But I’m happy that she did. Because that means that…”

“… _I won?_” she whispered, her face falling still. She looked at him, her eyes unreadable. “Did I do it on my own?”

“If you’re about to start saying things about how I am biased because I love you, I swear to god…” he stopped in his tracks, realizing what he just said. She looked up at him, her eyes wide.

“_…What…?” _her voice was quiet, not believing her own ears. Did he just…

He took a deep breath before speaking.

“_I love you, Claire._ It’s time I finally admit it. To you. And to myself. I’m tired of pretending, tired of dulling my own emotions when they are raging, stirring up a storm inside of me every time I see you. Hear me when I say it, loud and clear. _I love you, baby._” He looked deeply into her eyes, waiting for her to say something, anything to end his suffering.

“Ethan… _I love you too._ Thank you for believing in me, for putting your trust in me, for letting me see the amazing man that I know you are. The man that only I get to see.” She pressed their lips together again, kissing him hard, running her tongue along his lower lip.

Their kisses got hungrier and more desperate as seconds passed, his hands back on her body while hers worked on undoing the buttons on his shirt, undressing him and running her hands all over him, memorizing him, engraving the image of him in her mind.

He pulled her towards the bed, falling on it backwards, taking her with him, pulling her on top of him. she straddled him again, their hips meeting and drawing sounds from both of them.

He felt his resolve dissipating, opening his eyes and stopping his hands, looking at her.

“Claire… if you don’t stop doing _this…”_ he glanced down between them, blushing furiously like a schoolboy “… I won’t be able to stop myself. You have to tell me what you want.” He whispered the last part, taking in her face, gauging her reactions to him and his actions.

She leaned down slowly, kissing him again. He groaned, pulling her closer to him.

He flipped them, pinning her down underneath him, kissing her neck and going down slowly, his lips moving along her chest, down to her stomach.

“_Tell me what you want, Rookie” _he looked up from her stomach, his fingers trailing slowly along the waistband of her underwear.

It was funny. His nickname, that once was something that had a different meaning, now becoming a term of endearment.

_“I want you, Ethan. All of you.”_ she panted, her breathing hard, her chest moving up and down rapidly. He undressed her fully, leaning back to take a good look at her naked form.

“You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” His voice was strained with desire, eyes full of lust.

He ran his fingers up her leg, placing his fingers between her legs, her gasps and moans filling the silence of his bedroom. He kissed her lips softly, watching her face as he worked her, watching her features twist with pleasure. She bit her lip, trying to stop herself from moaning loudly. He reached towards her lip with his other hand, pulling to release it from her teeth.

“Don’t. I want to hear you.” looking deep in her eyes he said, his words pushing her over the edge.

She let out a loud moan, burying her fingers in his hair, hiding her face in his neck. He held her, helping her come down from her high, stroking her hair softly and whispering sweet things in her ear.

She gripped his jeans tightly, tugging on them impatiently.

“I think you are way to overdressed, mister. Let me help you with that.” She grinned, a playful sparkle in her eye. Her fingers ran up and down the zipper of his jeans, drawing a long, breathy moan from him.

“Claire…” he panted as she took his jeans off, then his underwear. Her fingertips touched him slowly and softly, not sure what she’s supposed to do, but that didn’t matter. Her every touch, even the smallest one, made him cry out in pleasure. He put his hand on hers, stopping her movement.

“Honey, if you don’t stop it now, I won’t be able to please you like you deserve to be pleased.” His voice was strained, like he was in pain.

Their kisses intensified, both nervous, uncertain what to do. Ethan stopped suddenly, his eyes panicked.

“Ethan… what is it?” she was concerned for him.

“I… I want this to be perfect. I want to be good for you. But I’ve never… I don’t want to hurt you, darling.” His head fell down a little. She put her hands on his face, making him look at her.

“Ethan, it’s going to be perfect no matter what, because it’s _with you._ That’s all that matters. Just be gentle and go slow.” She smiled softly, kissing his nose playfully to make him relax. It worked.

He connected their bodies slowly, kissing her when he knew he would hurt her, taking care of her, helping her get through the initial pain. But as time went on, she started to move her hips, tiny whimpers escaping her, looking at him, nodding her head. He understood, rocking them together, picking up the pace.

Loud moans could be heard, cutting through the otherwise quiet room. They were close, racing towards their release.

“_Say my name, baby. Do it.”_ his lips were pressed against her ear, driving her closer to the edge.

“Ethan… Ethan!” she moaned, her eyes slamming shut, on the brink of her release.

“Darling, open your eyes. Let me see you.” his fingers moved along her cheek.

She slowly opened them and looked into his, his eyes dark and intense.

Then, they snapped, both reaching their peak simultaneously, holding each other close.

“Claire…” he whispered her name, like a prayer, kissing her one last time before falling on the bed, rolling them so she was laying on his chest, both breathing heavily.

“I love you.” she looked into his eyes some time later, her face a picture of bliss and satisfaction.

“You’re my everything, Love.” He said, his voice strong and confident, pulling her even closer, tugging her under his arms.

They both fell asleep with smiles on their faces, feeling safe and loved.


End file.
